my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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