Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
ttyl tear gas
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
