Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
