don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize