Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(614): View more from Ohio

I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?

Fav 11 1749 845
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(309): View more from Illinois

My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass

Fav 35 4683 1416
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(607): View more from New York

I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name

Fav 13 7127 1450
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina

Fav 30 801 9170
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(208): View more from Idaho

On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?

Fav 13 5733 1259
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(214): View more from Texas

Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.

Fav 23 1738 4593
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(785): View more from Kansas

Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now

Fav 2 4018 1171
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(503): View more from Oregon

Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?

Fav 5 465 844
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(514): View more from Quebec

Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome

Fav 0 41 7
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