Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
She announced her abortion via fbk
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
