well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
