I wish i was in the wii world.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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