therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
it was like eating out sand paper
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Randomize
