Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize