I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize