zippers are such a cool invention
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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