You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
