That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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