only if we run a train.
done.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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