I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
