So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
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