Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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