Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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