You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize