May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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