Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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