As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
