carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
