I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize
