i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
