My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
