he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
