I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
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