your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
