It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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