She said her name was "party"
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
