Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
