is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Randomize