I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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