My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Randomize
