Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
