I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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