No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
