A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
