It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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