Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize