I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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