I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
