You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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