Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
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