Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
After tacos, we're chasing women.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
