Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Found the puke drawer
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
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