the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize