This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
