no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I got her a Nickelback box set.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Randomize
